I cannot remember what the discussion was about, but, I remember my son saying ” Linsey is the favourite in my class, she sits very nicely and reads very well, the teachers like her”.

Pretending I was not paying full attention, I asked nonchalantly, “What about you?”. He continued fiddling with his toys and said, ” I can’t sit as she sits, I get bored and I don’t read as good as she does”.

With this, I gave him a big hug and explained to him how special he is to me and how amazing he is at the things he is good at.

My son is six and he is the most intelligent boy I ever met. The truth is he is not bookish, he does not enjoy writing and you have to remind him of his school homework. He gets bored easily when he is in a classroom setting. He reads because it is part of the family tradition and this routine has taught him to relate to books differently. He has great mathematical skills and that’s all about school stuff.

He loves animals and enjoys talking about the life circles of each species. My son’s favourite ‘thing to do’ is to talk about the statistic of endangered animals. He knows what sound each jungle and extinct animals make and he has collections of different animals both land and sea.

At five, he knew all the dinosaurs, where the fossils were discovered and how big or little they were and how some of them got their names. He loves the outdoors. Zoos and museums are his favourite places to visit. He knows how each animal meets and what their babies are called. He knows the geographical location of each species and I marvel at his discoveries.

When shopping for books, my son prefers books with facts, books with animals fascinate him be it reptiles, sharks, creepy crawlies or jungle animals. He does change his interest from time to time, but, the only thing that remains the same is his love and amazement for other creatures other than human.

My son loves watching television, but, his interests overrules all our interests. We have seen most of the documentaries on the cat family at large, snakes (as wild as they are) and sea life. He could differentiate between snow leopards, mountain wild cats and the real jungle ones.

He knew the names of different “animal persons” (as he calls the presenters on wild animals) on BBC. I have learnt so much from this boy and I kept wondering where he got his facts from. He is natural when it comes to the animal world.

The most amazing thing about this boy is his ways of learning, he learnt differently from the rest of the kids I know. He grasps the meaning of things I never expected and his wisdom in dealing with issues surprises me every time despite my decades of experience working with children.

Not that it bothers me, but, this boy does not have any spectrum and he has not been diagnosed with autism after various sessions and classes with professionals.

I cannot say the same when it comes to classroom learning. He is laid back in the classroom and does not understand why he has to sit still for many hours listening to “Miss” while he could be out there discovering facts. He sometimes writes his “b”, “s” and “d” the other way round despite all the effort invested in getting these letters and sometimes numbers right.

My son has buttressed the point that we are all unique and learn uniquely. It is easy to get carried away with the stigma of how a child should learn and the shape of what should be learnt. The hierarchy of the classroom system has put many children into places where they do not belong.

As parents, the most important thing is to focus on how your child learns, not the competition placed on the child. The interest of the child matters more than his position in the classroom or how the teachers or other parents view his academic achievements.

I have since stopped placing unnecessary pressure on my children as far as learning goes. I have placed good morals and good upbringing over school grades. I try my best as a parent to nurture my children morally and spiritually not forgetting the importance of having a good education, but, without the pressure of school grade or academic achievements. Easy does it and that has been my watchword.

I am all for what makes my child TICK for how would I feel if I am being compared to others? How would I feel if all I do is being ignored? How depressed would I be if my children think I am a failure?

We are all special individuals, running different races. Instead of comparing and losing sleep over your child’s performance at school, take time to discover your child and encourage his growth and development.

Every child is special irrespective of the tag attached.