When The Table Turns

There was a young lady I worked with some years ago. She came to work with neatly packed sandwiches lovingly prepared by her mother. She was open about the stress her mother went through in making sure she had something to eat for lunch at work every single day.

At the time, I found it annoying. For crying out loud, this young lady was on placement and in her late teen. How on earth would her mother prepared lunch for her when she was old enough to cook for the whole family?

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My Plummeting Confidence.

My confidence did not just plummet and disappear into the faraway, it gradually diminished with worries, doubts and what not. I was not the type of person who could shake the ground with their speech or turn heads in astonishment when spoken. No, I was not.

In myself, I could gentle crept upon a person and made a presence. In my little circus, I was present, my opinions mattered, I was someone, a little force to reckoned with.

I was sure of what I knew, I could walk up to people without thinking of their views about me. I felt the world under my feet. I radiated confidence. Taking up challenges was seen as part of life and I had a grip over any that surfaced. (more…)

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Somewhere, In The Quietness Of My Mind.

Somewhere in the quietness of my mind, I remembered how I planned my life. The life I planned was a far cry from what I live right now. I planned a life free from worries and frivolities of now.

I was young and free when I had my life planned ahead of me. I was a Journalist in my planned life. Marriage was never part of it. I owned mansions in my planned life.

Children were never part of it, despite my love for little children, I didn’t see any from my loin. I was a career woman whose trade took to any part of the world, to whom children would be a hindrance.

I planned a life far from what I experience as a child. A life free from poverty and maltreatment. I never planned to fall in love, this was for the weak and helpless. I grew up seeing maltreatment from menfolk and I planned never to be a victim.

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